As cheesy as it is, do you want to know what the key to my heart is? A really good knock-knock joke! Yup, I’m that easy. But honestly, what’s wrong with that? Isn’t laughter supposed to be the best medicine?
In order to brighten your day and make you laugh out loud, I’d like to share my personal favorite flirty jokes, pick-up lines, one-liners, dirty pick-up lines and just some really funny jokes to crack you up because I’m sure you could use it.
So buckle up and make sure your mouth is empty because these might just make you spit your food out from laughing too hard.
Flirty Pick-Up Lines
How to be flirty over text and win over your crush through texting? Well, to be honest, it’s a lot easier job when you’ve got a good sense of humor. Lucky for you, I’ve got you covered.
Here are some cute, yet hilarious jokes that work as pretty good pick-up lines or sexting messages for her and him and will help you win the heart of that special someone! As much they try to not laugh, they just won’t be able to resist these gems. These funny and flirty questions are definitely a way to go.
10. I thought happiness started with an H. Why does mine start with U? 11. Mami you are on fire…Le’me be the wind and make you even hotter.
15. Excuse me, miss, can I have the time? I’d check my watch but I can’t take my eyes off you.
17. Hey, can I follow you home? (What?) Oh sorry, it’s just my parents told me to follow my dreams.
22. When a penguin finds its mate they stay together for the rest of their lives. Will you be my penguin?
Corny Pick-Up Lines
Be honest, corny jokes are just as funny as anything else, so why do they have such a bad rep? Here are some of the best pick-up lines that will change your mind and make you want to use one next time you’re trying to impress a boy/girl.
1. Boy: Girl, you remind me of a box of chocolates… Girl: Why? Boy: Cause I want to take your top off.
2. Boy: There are 20 letters in the alphabet right? Girl: (26, I think) Boy: I must have forgotten U R A Q T Girl: (You’re still missing one) Boy: I’ll give you the D later.
3. Boy: How does it feel? Girl: What do you mean? Boy: To be the only star in the sky.
4. Boy: Nickel for your thoughts? Girl: I thought it was a penny. Boy: I think your thoughts are worth more.
6. Boy: Girl, what’s your number? Girl: I have a boyfriend. Boy: I have a math test. Girl: What? Boy: Aren’t we talking about things we cheat on?
7. Boy: Will you read my palm? Girl: I don’t see anything. Boy: I didn’t expect you to because love is blind. 8. Boy: Have you ever dating a milf been fishing? Girl: Why? Boy: Because I think we should hook up!
10. Boy: Do you wanna be my SLUT? Girl: WHAT?! Boy: Do you even know what slut stands for? (S)weet (L)ittle (U)unforgettable (T)hing.
11. Boy: Oh my god it smells like up sexy in here. Girl: What’s up sexy? Boy: Oh nothing much, you?
12. Boy: So you going to be a butterfly all night? Girl: (puzzled look) Boy: You know, pretty to see but hard to catch!
13. Boy: Hi, I’m going to have to ask you to leave! Girl: Why? Boy: The sign says NO SMOKING….and you are definitely SMOKIN!